Thursday, August 30, 2007


I had my surgery as scheduled and did great with all things surgery-related. I did get a really bad UTI from the catheter, but have gotten over that with the help of antibiotics. Six days post-op, I was really sick though and my temp got up to 102.5* After talking with the surgeon's office, it was determined that I didn't have a uterine infection, but instead was still suffering from sinus related issues. My antibiotics was changed. I had a high temp for about 8 days!

I went to my regular DR today to follow up on what made me so sick post-op, as he wasn't aware of all that had been happening. I had 3 days of antibiotics left and he said that wasn't enough and gave me another round. I'm having so much trouble catching a breath! Then he gave me an inhaler, plus some Ambien since I'm not sleeping at night anymore. Then, he sent me down to the lab and I had a CAT scan of my head/sinuses. I'll know more from that the end of next week. I guess things are going much better around his office now that he has a new nurse! LOL
He told me that not being able to sleep after all the procedures I had done is normal. He wondered if I was going through a grieving process, knowing that for sure I can't have children now. He said, "You always had that hope before, but now it's gone."

Truthfully, I've been too sick to grieve! But also, I made peace with it pre-op. I mean, I had a "supernatural" peace from the Lord. It was a peace that I knew came from Him. So, post-op, I've only felt relief. No more ups and downs with infertility, no more wishing, hoping, grieving. Thirteen years was long enough! No, I'm not happy about the answer the Lord's given me, but I accept it. Now, to get well and go forward with life!

My DR told me today, "There's a reason for everything. God could have made you a man, but He made you a woman for a reason. God could have done any number of things, but He made you just like you are and He has you in this place for a reason. Now, you need to bless other people's lives. We're only given so much time on this earth and we must fill it by being and doing!" My DR rocks! LOL

Thursday, August 16, 2007

One more day!

I went to my pre-op appointment today and was thrilled to learn my BP meds are already working! My BP was down to 110/74, which is great for me!
I'm having a little trouble this evening with some pre-op stuff (I'll spare the details), but I'm looking forward to getting on the other side of this!
Thanks for all the thoughts and prayers!!

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Pre-op days

On Friday afternoon (8/10) I checked my BP and it was 187/104! I waited a few minutes and rechecked it and it was 174/102. Called the DR...he immediately placed me on BP meds! We drove straight to Muncie and picked them up. I started them that afternoon.
Six days later, I'm doing OK on them. They make me REALLY sleepy and rubbery feeling. But, at least I'm finally sleeping better. =)
I finished my antibiotics but I'm still running a fever and that has me worried! I SO want to get this surgery behind me! I go for a pre-op appointment tomorrow afternoon. My in-laws are coming tomorrow evening, spending the night and going to the hospital with us.
My husband is an only child and it grieves me to know we can't make his dad a grandpa (with a biological child).
I've been putting all my nervous energy to good use! I've scrubbed my house within an inch of its life! LOL I've made lots of food to freeze so that we won't starve while I've recovering. Although... Fred can make a pretty tasty grilled cheese!
Less than two days until show time!! Woohoo!! LOL

Friday, August 10, 2007

DR visit

I went to my regular DR (Rousseau) today because I have been sick all week with bronchitis type stuff. When we helped mom move last weekend, I got into a lot of mold and mildew in her old apartment and was Really sick on Sunday and it has just hung on all week. So, off to the DR I went because I HAVE to get well so that I can have my surgery next week!
He said he was very concerned about the junk I'd inhaled. My air way was very swollen and I have a hard time catching a breath. So, he put me on steroids for a few days to give me some relief. He also put me on an antibiotic for 7 days. He said taking the steroid will help my antibiotic to work better. Then, I'm on something else for the drainage, etc.

My blood pressure was 150/101. I wasn't nervous so I don't know what is up with that. He took it again and it was 151/103. My pulse was 110. I was running a temp too, so he hopes the high BP is just because I don't feel well. He said I have to get it checked again over the next few days because I can't go into surgery with it that high. He might put me on some meds to bring it down, he said.

You know all that trouble I had with that nurse of his. He apologized over and over. Then, he asked if I had met his new nurse! He just grinned! No, I hadn't met her! He let the other one go! He said in his French accent, "Mee-shelluh, she was crazy in the head!" LOL He gave me lots of details. Said she was very absent-minded and unorganized and that he just couldn't carry the load by himself. So, he now has a new nurse! He said he didn't feel so bad letting her go as she was able to get another job. We talked about what a nice person she is in general but he said she just wasn't a good fit for him.

I know a lot of people didn't understand why I thought the DR would be on our side, but I knew if I bid my time, it would all work out! He just hugged me and thanked me for speaking up. He said I wasn't the only one who had trouble with her and he said "when you just put it (all the complaints) all together it's just too much!" lol
So YAY! lol
Tonight I started out on 6 Prednisone and 2 antibiotics, so I'm hoping & praying all this mess with clear up.
I know it sounds nuts, but I am looking forward to this surgery! I can't wait to feel well!! Monday I started bleeding very heavily and by Tuesday was wearing 2 overnight pads in a Depends again. A girl can't live like that! lol It really crimps my style to wear a Depends to town!! LOL

Thursday, August 9, 2007

Blessed by another blogger...

I just finished an awesome Christian fiction book by author Tracey Bateman. I was just checking out her web site and saw this entry on her blog. Due to some current circumstances, this entry really blessed me!

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Yesterday was hard. It was one of those days where I felt like a failure. I cried and wrote in my journal, "Lord, how can I speak to your precious women about trusting and surrender and your ability to make them into the writer you've called them to be, when I so clearly haven't fully surrendered my own plans?"
I got discouraging news yesterday. News that made me feel like I'm not good enough. Like someone whose respect I truly want, just doesn't respect me at all. Ouch. That hurts. I had a day of asking the Lord to please take my hurt. please allow me the grace to keep moving if the answer from Him is "no" to the dream that I truly thought was His idea.

It's easy to be a Barbarian in theory. But when push comes to shove, do I lay down my weapon and give up, or do I hold up my leather shield against the onslaught of arrows coming at me and say, "NO if I fail, I fail trying."

It took all day for me to summon the strength to raise my shield, to flick off the arrows that had been stinging me all day. By the time I was ready to stop feeling sorry for myself, God spoke to my heart and once again assured me that He will complete that which He began in me. I dream so big, that there are going to be disappointments on the way up. There will be setbacks, there will be sore muscles, there will be flesh wounds. But only I decide if the wounds are unto death or annoyances that just make me more determined to stay in and continue to fight for the Heart of my King.

I choose to fight for His glory. I choose to complete my current assignments from him and make them truly something for his Honor. -Author Tracey Bateman

Someone is trying to use lies and evil to destroy something that is very close to me/us. I just told Fred last night I will not stand by and watch someone try to destroy this "thing" that is so special-that if "it" went down, I wanted to go down with "it", defending it! But, I know God is bigger than the lies and He will fight this battle on our behalf! My motto of late is "I will walk by faith, not by sight"

The same...

Author Lloyd C Douglas lived in a three story apartment building on the third floor.
Every morning he walked down to get his paper and spoke with a composer who lived on the first floor because he was confined to a wheel
chair. The man would tap his walking stick on the floor every day and tell Lloyd C Douglas, "That's Middle C" Lloyd would say, "Yes, I know. You told me yesterday and the day before."The composer said, "What do you think it will be tomorrow." Lloyd would smile and say, "Middle C" The composer would nod and say, "Just like God. He's the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow."

Wednesday, August 1, 2007


We were in Nashville, TN a couple years ago and tried Fried Dill Pickles for the first time. I was skeptical at first, but oh my gosh! Yum with a capital Y! Since then, we've had them locally, but they just couldn't compete with their southern counterparts. However, I found this recipe online and the pickles taste just like the ones we had in Tennessee. We eat them dipped in Ranch dressing. YUM.

Science of Pickles: Fried Dill Pickles Recipe

News from the DR's office

The good news I got today is that I don't have a blood-clotting disorder that they thought I might have. The other news I got is that the pelvic ultrasound I had done last week showed a polyp in my uterus that must come out and that maybe it is the cause of my heavy bleeding. Only 16 more days until surgery! Woohoo!! lol

Letter from our Adopted Soldier!!

We received a great gift in today's mail...our first letter from our adopted soldier!! What a fun surprise!! We weren't sure if we'd ever hear from him, but we're so excited to have a letter from him!
He writes:
I wanted to thank you for all that you have sent me. It surely helped me out a lot. Sorry it took so long to write back but had a lot of stuff to do. Thank you for the letters they are great. I have been waiting for a package from back home for longer than it took your letters and packages to get here. Weird, huh? I wanted to say thank you for all you do and how you help total strangers out in your work, so I guess we have something in common. Medicine is not only of the body & mind, but spirit and heart. I am an old fashioned kind of guy. I have a wife and 2 girls who I adore more than life itself. I have 2 brothers and 2 sisters and I am the youngest out of all. I have one brother in Iraq and my sisters are still stateside. As for being the youngest, I know how it feels to be left out of just about everything. I also have the best of friends over here. The best team that consists of three others. We are mechanics, sort of like what you do except instead of humans we do on vehicles. Have to get back to work now. It's been an honor to write you and I will write you a letter again soon! Freedom for all!!! (Those words were underlined). From Groll, Robert J US ARMY PS-Thanks for being an angel... SOLDIERS ANGEL!!! (underlined)